Posted by: Catherine Lugg | October 16, 2010

Dyson Kilodavis’ Joy

Dyson Kilodavis is a 5 year-old boy who LOVES girl’s clothes and jewelry. Dyson is a gender non-conforming child. He is also a joyous child. Please be sure to check out the part of the video of Dyson when he is literally dancing for joy. His parents have let him pursue his joy. And it’s amazing to behold. His joy in his own being is literally contagious. Who would not want to be with this child?

When Dyson first discovered his love of dresses and “bling,” instead of freaking out, his parents, Cheryl and Dean, started talking and listening. They educated themselves and are now educating other adults and children. Dyson’s mom, Cheryl, has even written the children’s book: My Princess Boy.

Clearly, Dyson’s parents and elder brother Dkobe are just fabulous as are his teachers. Furthermore, both his parents and teachers have had to “come out” to support this amazing child–not an easy task in a world that is particularly brutal to gender non-conforming boys. But Dyson is deeply loved by his entire family and school.

And so I ask those who believe Dyson should be put in society’s gender straight-jacket: Why are you so miserable? Why does this magnificent, joyous 5-year old scare you so very much?

This world, which can be so brutal and hate-filled, is sorely lacking in joyous adults. Fortunately, Dyson’s parents are protecting their joy-filled children (Dkobe is pretty darned nifty as well). If only more adults could be so devoted to their kids, this world would be a far better place.



  1. So it is possible to simultaneously not fit “traditional” gender behavior and be a well-adjusted person? Much of the political rhetoric around marriage and gender identity these days assumes such balance to be impossible. Seems much of what an individual needs is a supportive and affirming environment.

  2. Absolutely! Traditional gendered behavior is, pardon the pun, a fairy tale that homophobic folks tell each other. But these norms change over time. Think back to the turn of the 20th century, when very young children tended to be dressed as girls….at least in middle class families. At that time, no one thought anything of it.

    So yes, all children need support and need their parents’ approval and love. The world would be much less hateful if folks took a deep breath and not get so freaked out about what is “traditional.”

  3. […] Back in October, I commented on Dyson Kilodavis, his parents Cheryl and Dean, brother Dkobe. At the time I noted: When Dyson first discovered his […]

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